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Facing the reality
that you have homosexual feelings can
cause enormous inner turmoil. Especially if those feelings directly
conflict with deeply held values, beliefs
and life goals.
We know what it’s
like. We’ve been there.
We, too, once felt
hopelessly caught between two conflicting and painful choices:
·
either meet our deep longing for masculine love – but betray our
values, beliefs and life goals…
·
or
else be true to our values, beliefs and goals – but painfully
suppress our longings for love and masculine connection.
Either way, it
seemed, we lost.
Another Way Out
Like you, we never
chose to have homosexual feelings. So we couldn’t simply choose not
to have them.
We couldn’t just wish them away or will them away.
But we discovered
that we could address the
root causes of the conflict – which wasn’t really about sex at
all. Rather, the longing for male love was, for us at least, really
a deep, unmet need from childhood and youth:
·
A
longing for a father’s affirmation, perhaps. Or a mentor’s
guidance. A peer group’s inclusion. Or our own internal sense of
just being “one of the guys.”
What we really
needed was to fulfill – rather than suppress – the underlying, core
need: a need not for sex or romance with men but for brotherly love.
For male community. For self acceptance. And affirmation, as a man
among men.
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Simply put, we found:
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Change
is Possible |
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…by healing buried pain, |
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…authentically meeting our core needs |
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for love, acceptance and masculinity, |
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…and surrendering the rest. |
We call it
“A M.A.N.S. Journey”… a journey of
masculine connection. Of rigorous
authenticity. Of genuine
need fulfillment. And courageous
surrender.
On these pages,
those of us who have resolved past homosexual conflicts
share our stories and experience for the benefit of those who
may be conflicted, as we once were, and who seek similar change.
In sharing our
experience, we mean no disrespect to those who identify as gay and
choose to live a gay life. They are as deserving of respect as we
are. Their path may be right for them. We cannot judge another
person’s life.
All we know is that
this path of change is right for us. Because in it we have found
the healing, acceptance, love, brotherhood and peace that we had
really been seeking all along.
People
Can Change is a founding member of PATH
– a non-profit coalition of organizations that help people
with unwanted same-sex attractions (SSA) realize their personal
goals for change.
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